Thursday, June 21, 2007

Embry-NO!


Embry-NO!
As expected, President Bush vetoed the stem cell research bill, once again letting his religious and moral beliefs affect his ability to do any good for this country. Said Hillary Clinton: "This is just one example of how the president puts ideology before science, politics before the needs of our families, just one more example of how out of touch with reality he and his party have become." Amen Sister! Where's your Myspace page? I'm sending you a friend request as I write this. Oh, how cute. Barak Obama left you a picture comment.

Bush claims that putting an end to a human life for research purposes (as opposed to oil, right?) is one line that he will not cross, yet he comes from Texas, a state that takes pride in how many criminals they kill. Apparently, once you commit a felony, you're no longer a human being in the eyes of the law (and the religious right). Hey! Why not conduct medical experiments on convicts? Or Iraqis! Wouldn't that solve everyone's problem? Holy crap! I could be president. Ok, I digress.

Calling a stem cell a human being is like a calling a cocoa bean a Hershey bar. There is a long way to go before totipotent cells (embryonic stem cells) even think of becoming a fetus. Most of the research being done can be conducted on pluripotent or multipotent cells, which are not embryonic stem cells. Also, do not confuse totipotent, pluripotent and multipotent cells with fluripotent cells, which I completely made up.

(Thanks to Trine for helping me straighten out some facts. In hindsight, "Who gives a flying fuck about embryos" isn't the most coherent argument.)

Within this debate, I often hear the term "playing God" thrown around by people who like clichés and don't like thinking for themselves. Well, you know what? The entire field of medicine is "playing God". I would not be here if my doctor hadn't played God 26 years ago, nor would my girlfriend or countless others who are not lucky to be genetically perfect. Medication is 'playing God.' Whether you're popping pills to keep your cholesterol down or your dick up, you're playing God. Those Christian Scientist fuckbags have a point; the difference is that I am not insane. I actually value human life so I say, "Bring it on Doc. Play God!" If you want to bring religion into this argument, one could argue that God gave us the technology to be able to use for the greater good, i.e. saving human lives and making sure that I can still rock a 3 hour and 59 minute long erection when I'm 70 without having to consult a physician.


Say What Now?
I recently read that a brand new video game called 'Manhunt 2' was banned by British censors for depicting 'casual sadism.' What is that? Torturing someone while wearing jeans?


You know what I love? Walk off home runs. Baseball season is a wondrous time of year. Go Sox!


Bruised Apple? Pilot Inspektor to the Rescue!
An intervention is needed. Celebrities are in crisis! It's common knowledge that many celebrities treat their kids like trophies, which is awful enough. Even the celebrities who do not adopt still find ways to let the world know they're selfish assholes. This is evident in the names celebs give their children. For example, Apple Martin, Pilot Inspektor Riesgraf-Lee, Suri Cruise and Coco Arquette are all real names bestowed upon celebrity spawn. Sly Stallone named his kid Sage Moonblood. I shit you not.

No kid is going to enjoy being named Apple or Coco. That sounds more like my breakfast than suitable names for a child. When Kal-el (Nicholas Cage's son) is getting beat up on the playground, the kids aren't going to care that his dad is famous, nor are they going to care that Kal-el is Superman's birth name. When Apple is being teased by the other kids, they won't care that her father makes boring music. I'm not saying everyone needs to be named Jessica or Joseph. There is certainly room for creativity and originality, but…come on. People are so fast to use the cliché "think of the children" so for fuck's sake, think of the children!


Grand Finales

Life doesn't always give you closure. Life doesn't always have neat tidy endings with clear and concise explanations as to what happened and why. So that's why we turn to TV! But sometimes, TV decides to fuck with our heads and give us a symbolic 'what does it all mean' ending that provides more questions than answers and just pisses us off. So we ask ourselves why we devoted the past 6 years following this television show (Sopranos!) just to have some artsy fartsy ending make us wonder if the power went out. Sometimes the pressure of it all can go to a script writer's head. David Chase knows he can't please everyone, so he opts to please no one but himself. Does Tony die? There are various signs that point to yes. That guy in the diner in the final scene happened to be the second cousin of a guy that Christopher 'whacked' back in episode 4 of season 3. What? You missed that episode? Damn, if only you'd had DVR back then. I haven't felt so empty by a series finale since Seinfeld. Then again, how do you end a show about nothing?


In all honesty, I'm over Sopranos. Some call the ending genius; others feel like they got 'whacked' in the end. But due to the fact that I've attended two wakes the span of six days, I can't help but think of finales. I began to ask myself how I would write the final day (episode) of my life I knew it was the end. Sometimes I picture an action packed episode with crazy explosions, fire fights and a climactic final scene! Perhaps even a topless scene. Hell, let's go full frontal. It's my last day! Other times, I think I'd opt for a dialogue driven, thoughtful and artistic ending with lots of symbolism, meaningful dialogue and, of course, a tastefully done full frontal nude scene. I'd go out with a simple final breath as the credits begin to roll; one final inhalation and then no more. It's an interesting thought to ponder and I'm honestly not sure how I would write it. All I know is that I would not let David Chase anywhere near the script!

By the way, one of the best, saddest, yet most satisfying finales I've seen was for the HBO show 'Six Feet Under.' Utterly amazing.

2 comments:

PastorMax said...

Hey Ryan, as one of those people who filter this world with my faith, I am as offended with your lumping believers together as you are will President Bush.

There are many methods of collecting stem cells for research without having to create life in order to end it.

The Lord gave us knowledge and skills in order to fight disease and the ills of this world, but that isn't without some restraints to do so within the boundaries of moralistic values.

This post is from a man whose mom will die from the pains of MS and whose infant son will die within a year without a liver transplant.

L said...

"Calling a stem cell a human being is like a calling a cocoa bean a Hershey bar."

Touche, Ryan.