Thursday, May 31, 2007

This Month in Life...

Hey everyone,

To paraphrase Alvin and the Chipmunks, it's been a while but I'm back in style.

Sick on a Plane!
In Atlanta, Georgia, a man infected with the extensively rare and drug-resistant form of Tuberculosis known as XDR TB (whoa! Badass) knew he was not supposed to travel overseas but did so anyway. Go figure. The man is currently quarantined at an Atlanta, Georgia hospital. He claims health officials had said they "preferred" he not travel, but knew about his plans to go overseas for his wedding and honeymoon. Legallyl, he could not be stopped from flying. Ok, let me get this straight: They "prefer" you not fly with a highly infectious form of TB, but they absolutely will not let you on the plane w/ more than 3 ounces of shampoo. Our post 9/11 world is a strange place indeed.

Tubby Majority
Jerry Falwell, the evangelical minister and founder of the Moral Majority, the Christian right political movement, died a couple weeks back at the age of 73. He had a history of heart problems, which is no surprise, what with all the gays running around getting married and them women folk getting the abortions. Of all the important things that Falwell accomplished in his lifetime, which include founding a university, he will mostly be remembered his anti-gay rants aimed at Tinky Winky, the purple Teletubby from that creepy kids TV show. I'm sure God would be proud.

Sofa King What?
Angelina Jolie plans to take a year off from acting to spend more time with Brad Pitt and their little trophies…err, kids. I'm not much of a thespian. I can't even act like I care.

Paris Hilton is "emotionally distraught and traumatized" over her 45-day jail sentence, said her psychiatrist. Hilton was sentenced due to violating terms of her probation stemming from an alcoholic-related driving incident. Does anyone really feel bad for Paris Hilton? Seriously? You know what makes me emotionally distraught and traumatized? The fact that I live in a world where people are so enthralled with a fugly anorexic socialite whose only real claim to fame is that her parents fucked.

Once a Cheetah, Always a Cheetah!
New research shows that female cheetahs in the wild are very promiscuous and nearly half of their litters are made up of cubs with different cheetah baby daddies.

The Zoological Society of London said, "While the serial infidelities of the females does ensure a broader genetic mix to help the survival of the endangered species, it comes at a cost."

Multiple cheetah sexual partners mean more risk of parasites and various Cheetah STDs, such as Cheetah herpes and Cheetah AIDS.

Plus, after the female cheetahs get freaky with all the male cheetahs in the immediate vicinity, they have to travel further to find cheetahs who they haven't done the dirty cheetah deed with, leaving themselves open to attack, meanwhile their cubs are left home alone without a cheetah father figure to look up to and they end up getting into all sorts of trouble, such as vandalizing trees and raping elk.

Lights out!
In New Zealand, a utility company cut off power to the home of Folole Muliaga, a woman connected to an electric oxygen pump, causing her death. The company insists it was not aware she was dependent on the machine. The family claims the company is calling them liars. The electric company then said: "Yeah, whatever, as if."

The 44-year-old mother of four died two hours after a contractor working for Mercury Energy cut power to the house over an unpaid bill worth 168.40 New Zealand dollars, which is $123 U.S.

Ok, so not to sound like a total asshole, but putting aside the issue of whether the power company knew of the woman's condition or not, if you were on a machine that was dependent on electricity, wouldn't you make it a priority to pay your electric bill? Or at least get a back up generator or battery? The electricity can go out for a variety of reasons and I'd want to be sure that if I needed electricity to live, I'd be well protected in case of inclement weather or any other circumstance that could render me without power. Regardless, her death was not in vain; it will make a great "Ripped from the Headlines" Law and Order episode! Dun-dun!

This month in life…
Though I haven't been blogging much in the past month, a lot has been going on. I've made about four trips to Miami to visit my girlfriend, whom I plan to move down to live with in the next few months. She's a great girl and I've always wanted to move to warmer climate. Recently, Miami was given the distinction of having the worst road rage of all major metropolitan areas. So I'll fit right in, except I'll actually be a legal resident with valid U.S driver's license.

Coincidentally, my mother, her boyfriend and my brother will also be moving to Florida this summer, which is great.

While on the topic of relationships (sort of), sometimes you do things for those you love that you normally wouldn't do. For example, last week I watched my first ever episode of So You Think You Can Dance, or as I prefer to call it: So You Call That a Camel Toe? Seriously, watch the show. You'll see what I mean. Oddly enough, I enjoyed the program. It's like American Idol, but entertaining.

Also, I recently announced that Championship Vinyl, the acoustic group that I've been a member of since 2003 w/ my best mate Beau, will be disbanding this summer. This is a bittersweet turn of events. Both Beau and I have plans to leave the state and move on to new phases in our lives, which is awesome, but it will also put a 13-year song writing partnership on hiatus. I don't want to say it's the end, because Beau and I will certainly be writing music and, technology permitting, new Champ Vinyl music is not out of the question.

In the meantime, we will be uploading new music (new songs, as well as live cuts from recent shows) and playing a couple farewell shows in Middletown. For more details, please check out Championship Vinyl's myspace page ( and add us as a friend if you haven't already.

I aim to keep writing music and even playing some shows. I may or may not try and find new people to play with once I move to Miami, but for now I'm thinking the solo route may be the best way to go. That way I can get famous and check into rehab when the pressure of it all becomes too much for me to handle.

Also, I've been keeping up with my writing. Check out my CD reviews on, a kick ass music site.

Hope you all enjoyed the long weekend. Thanks for reading!