Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Barry being Barry

Hi all,

So it's been a few weeks since I was let out of the hospital. For the most part, things have been going well. I had a bit of setback on Saturday night, which resulted elevated bilirubin levels and I once again have a bit of a yellow hue. However, I'm on the mend. It's just going to take some time for things to return to normal. My liver functions are either the same or better than they were when I was released. So, slowly but surely, I'm getting back to my old self. I've gotten back to the gym a few times. I've lost a considerable amount of strength, but retained a decent amount of muscle tone so it shouldn't be too hard to come full circle once I'm back at the gym on a regular basis.

In other news, I've booked my first ever solo acoustic show for Saturday, August 25 @ Starbucks on Hebron Ave. in Glastonbury, CT. As many of you know, my acoustic group Championship Vinyl was supposed to have an awesome final show about a month back, but due to my illness, we were unable to perform. Beau has since moved to Michigan and on to the next adventure in his life. I'm incredibly happy for him. Meanwhile, I'm hangin' in Connecticut till I find a job in Florida. I'm really excited about playing this show and hope that people in the area will come out and join me. I'll be playing some Champ Vinyl tunes, some covers and a bunch of new tunes I've written. I'll have copies of my CD available for sale (cheap!).

Ok, onto the fun stuff!

I Doesn't Like Sara Lee!!
I really dislike the slogan for Sara Lee, the popular dessert maker. Like me, many people probably think the slogan is "Nobody Does It Like Sara Lee," which would actually make sense. It's actually "Nobody Doesn't Like Sara Lee," which just plain obnoxious. Why not "Nobody Doesn't Not Like Sara Lee?" or "Sara Lee is Not Not Liked by Nobody." If you're going for the confusing, take it all the way!

To Be Blunt…
This needs to be said. It's been a long time coming and I've kept my mouth shut, but I can't any longer. James Blunt is terrible. His song "Beautiful" is downright atrocious. I know there are some women reading this thinking, "But, it's such a sweet song!" No, it's not. The guy sings like a chick to chicks and somehow chicks eat it up. His lyrics indicate a musical partnership with a lovesick 12 year old boy. I recently read that his new record is going to "revolutionize soft rock." It doesn't take much to revolutionize soft rock. When a white guy with a jerry curl and a saxophone that looks like a flute can revolutionize soft rock, the bar isn't set very high to begin with. I saw an interview where Blunt said that he doesn't care about people criticizing him or "Beautiful" because that song has gotten him laid a ton. To that I wittily retort: Enjoy your bounty. You still suck.

Oh, Henry!
Well, it's done. Baseball's taint, Barry Bonds*, finally broke the homerun record. Congrats to Barry and his chromagnum forehead. Hitting 756 homeruns: So easy a caveman can do it. Sorry, Henry 'Hank' Aaron. It's a bittersweet moment in baseball history; well, mostly bitter, but I suppose there are a lot of Barry fans out there.

I know some Barry supporters argue that steroids can't make you hit a ball. I agree with this wholeheartedly. I'm not saying Barry isn't a good ball player. He has an eye for pitches that allow him to make good swings and connect with the ball. After all, you can't get a home run if you don't hit the ball in the first place. I won't deny that the guy deserves a lot of credit. That being said, while steroids don't help Barry hit the ball, I'm sure having that chemically engineered power behind the bat helped fuel some of those homeruns that might otherwise have stayed inside the park. It's a tainted accomplishment any way you look at it.

You know who should have to take steroids? Golfers! It might make that game watchable on some level. How I'd love to see Tiger Woods with 'roid rage; throwing around his clubs, splashing in the water traps, tossing handfuls of dirt at people from the sandtraps. Hell, I'd just like to see him crush a golf ball so far it leaves the course. I bet it'd be tough to hit a putt with a syringe of anabolic goodies coursing through his system. Oh can dream!

Enjoy your Wednesday